Monday, August 15, 2011

Starting Over

I have been absolutely negligent of my blog for months now.  I admit that I have become a Facebook junkie!!  But I also have been at a total loss as to what to write about for a long, long time.  I finally have something I feel will be fun - my move to start my life over in Illinois!  Facebook has been a big part of making that happen because I've become reacquainted with so many childhood and high school friends who are helping me with this move.

When Stephany was 5, and my dad was starting to lose his health, I wanted to move back to Illinois to be near my dad and, hopefully, live a more simple life.  That was 12 years ago!  Throughout that time I have prayed and planned, begged God to make it happen, have gotten mad at God when it didn't happen, and, finally, resolved myself to the fact that it probably never would happen.  I never gave up on the dream.  I just decided to quit obsessing about it so much and live my life where I've been planted.  I should know by now that when you finally surrender something you want so badly that God will step in.  If it is His will, He will make it happen!

Through different situations, I am now getting to move back to the place I love more than anywhere!  My car will be loaded on a flat bed trailer on August 23rd.  It will be moved, packed to the ceiling, with the things that I am taking with me.  I will be flying out of Portland on August 24th.  God has provided the way for me to be able to afford to do this and I don't have to drive 2000 miles by myself!

The bittersweet part is that I am leaving both of my daughters, my son-in-law and my grandchildren behind.  Stephany is staying with her dad so that she can go to high school in Vancouver.   I am praying that this separation will help her to be more responsible as I have a tendency to mother her to death.  It is time for her to experience some life without Mom being there to "help".   I will get to see her at Christmas break, but I'm sure it's going to be a long four months for us.  Missy and I have only been apart for 6 months of her life when I moved out here and she lived with her dad in Iowa.  I have never been apart from my grandkids.  I will now find out what it is like to be a long distance Nana.  Emma just turned one and it so easy for them to forget you at that age. All of us will be on Skype a lot!!  Especially so that Emma can see her Nana and, hopefully, will remember who I am.  I get teary just thinking about the goodbyes!

I haven't been good about pictures in the past, but I got a new camera for Christmas and I plan on using it a lot to document everything. I hope that you'll stop by so you can read about my new adventures.


Julia said...

Wow! I am happy for you in your new venture. I know it must be hard for you to leave your kids behind. But when we know things are from the Lord's hand there is peace. I look forward to seeing the posts that follow. Blessings to you!

Farmgirl Cyn said...

We use skype a couple of times a week to "visit" with my daughter in MT. I get to see my granddaughter, Trena, and interact with her, making faces, laughing, and watching her jump around the living room. It is not the same as being in the same room, but it is certainly the next best thing!

Darlene said...

What a bittersweet post! My prayers are always with you and your family. I look forward to your new journey. Our Lord must have something very special in store as it certainly took Him a long time to get everything in order just for you!